Without You
by Strazdas
Summary: Third in the You Were Mine Series. You can't feel the pain inside me. You don't understand how alone I feel when you ignore me like this. Please, Hiro... Please come back to me.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: Fruits Basket does not belong to a human by the online screen name of Author 888.**

Note: Book 3… Doesn't it seem like forever since it's started? Book 3 takes place about four months after book 2 ended, and it once again starts at a wedding. This time I would like to tell you the main characters are Kisa, Hiro, and that ebony-eyed woman.

Update: I have a new monitor!

Update: I have the sudden urge to write about a battle between Mother Theresa and Mother Goose.

Mother Goose: "Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. Jack be hit by this candlestick."

Mother Theresa: "I dodge your blow and teach you the way of God."

Mother Goose: "Little bird, little bird, fly away home. Your house is on fire and your children are burning."

Mother Theresa: "I've been a bad nun… a very bad nun. I've had many and many children. I've been horrible. Horrible… I say!"

_**Many times**_

_**They**_

_**Told us**_

_**That we wouldn't make it**_

_**Live your life**_

_**Without him**_

_**You don't have to take it**_

_**But they didn't know**_

_**We loved each other so**_

_**And that was enough**_

_**To keep us on the road**_

_**There were hard times**_

_**And there was pain**_

_**There was some good times, baby**_

_**And oh how it rained**_

_**We've learned to laugh**_

_**We learned to lie**_

_**We've learned to love**_

_**We've learned to try**_

Kisa sat alone against the wall of the ballroom. Most of the Sohmas and the few Hondas were dancing around the new bride and groom. She watched the happy couple smile and hoped Tohru's luck had turned around. After the incident with Yuki, Tohru's life was finally starting to pull back together. Now, there was the new incident…

Most of the couples were out dancing, enjoying each other's company. Why could she not have a good day also? Hiro could not make the wedding or the reception. He had a business meeting in Beijing with the Chinese division. Why had he stopped paying attention?

She felt starving again. _The baby…_ All the other children were running around the room, playing. Tiburo was chasing Takasho, Ritsu and Mitsuru's child. _How old is the child now…three?_ _Yes, I believe he's three._

She noticed everybody returning to his or her seats and watched the room darken. A spotlight fell on Kyo and Tohru. It was time for the spotlight dance. The two stood close to each other, hands around each other's waist. The song started, and the dance flowed gracefully from the couple.

It ended and everybody joined the couple on the dance floor again. _Why does he do this to me every time? He never is around when I need him to be. _She looked up to see the bride walking to her.

"Kisa! There you are. You should be out having fun… or at least eating. You need food, don't you? I'll go get some." She turned around and took a step away.

"Stop! I'll go with you, Sissy."

"Okay!" She made her hand into a thumb up and began to run forward, soon tripping on her dress and falling forward. "Ouch!" She jumped back up, barely remaining standing as Kisa ran up to hug her.

"Are you okay, Sissy?" She let go, and Tohru finally got a chance to breathe.

"Yes, just fine." She heard Kisa's baby scream for food again. "Come on!"

They made their way through the buffet, filling the plate. Tohru looked Kisa straight in the eye, and she told her, "You can't leave here until you eat it all. You hear me."

"Yes, Sissy…" She returned to her seat, eyeing the overfilled plate. "I think Tohru's trying to make my baby fat." She took her first bite. "I don't think I can eat this all."

She continued to watch the dancers as they twirled around the ballroom floor, the formal clothing adding to the brilliance of the scene. It reminded her of her wedding, only a few short months ago. "Why?!" Tears fell from her eyes as she remembered how happy she was. Hiro was her's forever.

_If that's true, then why does it not seem like it? He's never around, and when he is…_ She looked down at her plate to find it finished. _Why? Why then does he just leave me alone!? Why does he- Why does he…_

She threw her plate to the wooden floor, shattering the porcelain and sending shards all around. "I can't take it anymore!"

Tohru looked in her direction, watching the girl stand above the broken dinnerware. Blood trickled from the new cut on her left cheek, dripping from her chin down onto her black heels. Everything was silent, the shock of the moment still sinking into the brains of the guests.

"Isn't that girl usually quiet?"

"The mood swings are getting bad, huh?"

"Did she really do that?"

Kisa looked up to see all faces on her, and instantly, her face flushed a bright red. She ran towards the door and out to the Zen garden surrounding the building. "I can't believe I just did that!" Her hands were in her face, and she continued running. "I won't stop. I won't stop."

"She's changed…"

"To think she used to be so innocent and quiet."

"What happened?"

Tohru looked to Kyo, waiting for him to give her the signal. He nodded, freeing her to follow Kisa. She exited just in time to see Kisa disappear behind the nearby tree. "Kisa!" She continued to run, following Kisa around the tree and onto a bridge over a small creek.

Kisa stood on the edge, her arms wide open to embrace the end. She opened her eyes to see the creek below with just enough water to end it all. "Sleep embraces all who seek it, but it only stays for the weakest, such as me."

"Kisa! Kisa!" Tohru ran onto the bridge, stumbling over her dirty wedding gown. "Stop this! What are you doing out here? You need to go back in there and have fun."

Kisa put her arms down and looked over her shoulder, looking straight at Tohru. "Oh, Sissy, it's you." She looked down at her bloody palms. "I'm so stupid. I don't deserve to live."

Looking at Kisa, Tohru felt pity for the girl she knew. "Yes you do. You deserve to live more than any person I know."

"Not according to Hiro. He's changed, Tohru. He's not the man I married. He's not even the little pest he used to be to you…" She sat down, cleaning her hands on her dress. "I'm sorry, Sissy."

"It's not your fault…"

"It has to be, even if it makes no sense." She let a tear fall to her face.

"It'll get better. I promise it will… It has to." Tohru hugged the crying girl. _It has to get better… for your sake, Kisa._

"That's what you said four months ago!" More tears fell from her face. "I can't take it anymore!"

"I won't let anything bad happen." Tohru looked down at the head buried in her soaked gown. "I promise…"

"Don't you remember? He… He… He hits me!"

_**Oh, marriage is hard**_

_**Oh, how we know**_

_**But we learned to pray**_

_**To the master we go**_

_**We go**_

_**There were hard times**_

_**There was pain**_

_**There were some good times, baby**_

_**But oh how it rained**_

_**It rained, it rained, it rained**_

_**I am sorry**_

_**Oh-oh**_

_**We've learned to say**_

_**Please forgive me**_

_**That's what's**_

_**Kept us together**_

_**Today**_

_**Oh-oh**_

_**That's what's**_

_**Kept us**_

_**Together today**_

Note: Well, book three has now officially started to sadness. Why is it that the Sohmas can't have a good relationship? What could this mean for Kisa and they baby? Will something worse happen? Can you believe I'm this evil? Anyway, I do hope that I can update faster during Spring Break (this week) so look for updates during this whole time.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: As always, I do not in anyway own Fruits Basket or any of its merchandising rights. These merchandising rights belong to lucky people whom are not I.**

Note: Hmm… Does everybody hate me by now? I ruined Tohru's life, repaired it, killed her daughter, made her almost be killed by a Spanish prostitute named Carmelita, ruined Kisa's life, impregnated her, and it's getting worse.

Update: Now… I'm just being lazy. I need to work on this more.

_**I wonder where your heart is**_

'_**Cause it sure don't feel like it's here**_

_**Sometimes I think you wish**_

_**That I would just disappear**_

_**Have I got it all wrong?**_

_**Have you felt this way long?**_

_**Are you already gone?**_

_**Do you feel lonely**_

_**When you're here by my side?**_

_**Does the sound of freedom**_

_**Echo in your mind**_

_**Do you wish you were by yourself**_

_**Or that I was someone else?**_

_**Anyone else.**_

_**Where would you be**_

_**If you weren't here with me?**_

_**Where would you go?**_

_**If you were single and free**_

_**Who would you love?**_

_**Would it be me?**_

_**Where would you be?**_

_Dear Diary,_

_It's been a whole month since Tohru and Kyo got married, and they're marriage is working out fine. At least one marriage is… Hiro still hasn't paid any attention to me since the trip to China. He goes out every morning without a word and arrives home after dark, usually around six or seven._

_What's wrong with me that he tries his hardest to avoid me? Am I just wrong? Am I the one who's holding him down? Does he hate me? Should I just leave and never come back? What would happen if I weren't here? Would he find new love? Would he care? Would he even notice?_

What should I do, Diary? I don't think he loves me anymore. I think he's forgotten all our vows to each other and all the work we put into this relationship. I don't think he even notices me. I'm just a ghost that sees him.

Kisa sighed as she saved the document to her computer, hiding the document in the folder again. The baby kicked, letting her know that it was still hungry. "Nothing ever satisfies you, does it?"

She smiled, knowing that the baby was her sole joy at the moment. If anything was to happen to the baby… she did not know what she would do. _Tomoko… I promise I won't let anything happen to you._

She went to the kitchen and ate, throwing the dishes in the sink for cleaning later, and she entered the den, seeing Hiro sitting on the couch, still in his suit. "How was the meeting today? Did Sageki get a new partnership?"

"What does it matter to you? It's not like you work at Sageki. You wouldn't benefit either way."

"Yes it would! It would benefit me greatly if my beloved husband was happy, but I guess that's not possible… I guess you didn't get the partnership…"

"No… we didn't. If you want to know that badly, Sageki didn't even come close to getting the partnership."

"I'm sorry…"

"I don't need your pity."

"Hiro, would it even matter to you if I disappeared… forever?"

"Of course it would. I wouldn't be the same without you."

She bit her lip, almost shedding a tear in pain. "You… You're already not the same. You've changed so much."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Kisa. I still love you."

"Then show it once and a while… I've haven't heard the words I love you for three months now… Not once…" She could not hold it anymore. The first tear flowed down her cheek as she realized just how long it has been.

"Has it really? I thought I had said it just…" He paused in thought. "Maybe it has been a problem, but I promise I'll treat you better."

"Okay then… I'm going to prepare for bed. I hope to see you tonight." She turned away and walked up the stairs to the second floor bedroom. That was one advantage of being a Sohma, how wealthy the family was. They could afford a large house, even if it was an unhappy house. "I hope this isn't one of your empty promises."

Within the next half hour, Kisa was laying in bed letting her sleep overcome her. She thought about the baby girl in her stomach, and how easily it would be to hurt her. _I won't let you be hurt. I won't. I won't… I won't. Nobody will be able to hurt you._

_Kisa was in a field with a little girl in her arms, wrapped in blankets and sleeping. The baby let out a small giggle, and it's arm rose and grabbed at her sleeve. "Goo… ga goo."_

_"I love you too." Kisa kissed Tomoko on the forehead, holding the child closer to her. "I'll always love you." Suddenly, the wind started to pick up and rain started to pour down. Kisa started to walk towards the city in the distance, heading for shelter. The rain fell harder and harder, Kisa making less and less progress._

_"We'll make it to shelter, even if it takes all my strength." The baby started to cry and flail her arms rapidly, droplets of water falling in the child's mouth. Soon, the child started to cough and began to get pale._

_"NO! I won't let you die." She stopped and tried to burp the baby, breaking hearing the baby cry louder. Suddenly, the crying and wriggling stopped. Kisa looked at the corpse, her eyes downcast and covered with shadow._

"I failed. I failed again. I failed at being a wife, a lover…a mother. What have I succeeded at?"

Thunder woke her from the nightmare as she sat up from the cold sheets. "He never came to bed…" She looked around the dark room, searching for a flashlight. Soon she found it, looking where the small circular spot of light landed. "What's this?"

In her hand was a small piece of paper, the words smudged and almost impossible to read. "Dear Hiro, Did you te… that you were going to China aga…? I im…ne you did and can't w… you again. Well the…, see you, d…. –Naomi Hasagawa."

The paper fell from her hands almost instantly. Was he cheating on her with this woman? Were the trips to Beijing, Shanghai, and Hong Kong all lies to see her?

"Tell this isn't true. Tell me this is all a misunderstanding." She opened the door and walked silently down the stairs to the lit den.

"Umm… Hiro." The voice stopped Kisa mid-step, and she peeked around the wall to see two people. One was Hiro, his shirt open. He was kissing the neck of a woman with ebony hair. The hair was messy, and she had her arms wrapped around his body.

"Naomi…" Hiro let out a light moan of pleasure as she moved her hand past one of his nipples. Her head turned to where she could see half of her face. That's when it hit her.

_It's the woman that was in front of Tohru on the plane!_

_**I don't want to hold you back**_

_**No I don't want to slow you down**_

_**I don't want to make you feel**_

_**Like you were tied up and bound**_

'_**Cause that's not what loves about**_

_**If there's no chance we can work this out**_

_**Tell me now**_

_**Oh, tell me, tell me now**_

_**Where would you be**_

_**If you weren't here with me?**_

_**Where would you go?**_

_**If you were single and free**_

_**Who would you love?**_

_**Would it be me?**_

_**Where would you be?**_

_**Have I become the enemy?**_

_**Is it hard to be yourself in my company?**_

_**Where would you be**_

_**If you weren't here with me?**_

_**Where would you go?**_

_**If you were single and free**_

_**Who would you love?**_

_**Would it be me?**_

_**Where would you be?**_

_**Oh tell me, tell me now**_

_**Where would you be?**_

_**Where would you go?**_

_**Who would you love?**_

_**Would it be me?**_

Note: O.o Wow… So A- Where is the fan base I had for the last two books. They've just up and vanished. With that in mind, I would like to thank the two that actually stayed with me and reviewed. You know who you are and from now on, I will send a preview of the next chapter in the reply if they want it. It will only be a few sentences, but it will be something. B- It's all attached in the end. The trip to America, Naomi, and Kisa's bad timing… Perhaps somebody's planning this. Me you say… Possibly. Will Hiro admit to cheating, or will he be like so many other men? What does this mean for the relationship? Is it Tohru and Yuki all over again? (Why is it that I can never keep Yuki alive for a whole fanfic?) C- Can you believe I'm actually going to start on a horror story based off of a song by Weird Al Yankovic. XD


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: If tomorrow I owned Fruit's Basket, I'd be very happy indeed, yet tomorrow I won't own Fruit's Basket. Too bad!**

Note: As you may have guessed, a lot has happened since I last updated. Duh! Let's see, I've gotten a deadly disease, cured the deadly disease, taken a trip to New York, repaired a fight with a good friend, got mildly addicted to World of Warcraft, became rich on Gaia… yeah. I kinda forgot about this fic… sorry.

**_For you I was a flame _**

**_Love is a losing game_**

_**Five-story fire as you came**_

_**Love is a losing game**_

_**One I wished I never played**_

_**Oh, what a mess we made**_

_**And now the final frame**_

_**Love is a losing game**_

_**Played out by the band**_

_**Love is a losing hand**_

_**More than I could stand**_

_**Love is a losing hand**_

_**Self-professed, profound**_

'_**Til the tips were down**_

_**Though you're a gambling man**_

_**Love is a losing hand**_

It was strange how the thing that returned one of her greatest joys, Sissy, brought the worst evil she had ever met, this ebony-eyed Naomi. She watched as Hiro enjoyed dainty touches against his skin. He had always enjoyed doing things like that softly…

Kisa had always been the person to touch his bare chest softly. How she enjoyed the gentle shivers it had sent down his spine… Now it was all gone. He had given those pleasures to somebody else. _I can't believe you did this, Hiro. You've given away my favorite pleasures in life._

She felt a tear run down her face, dropping onto the polished wooden floor. She felt words pushing out of her mouth. She heard a soft moan escape her tightly pressed together lips. More tears started to fall down her face, and she soon felt her body running back up the stairs.

She heard that little voice in her head tell her to quiet down, warning her that it would be better if Hiro did not know that she knew. _What does it matter if he knows? _Tears fell onto each step as she made her way up, slamming the door behind her. _Sissy… Now I know why he hates me._

Even then, she still could not figure out why she did not want to let him go. "Tomoko… I don't know what to do about Daddy. I want to slap him and leave him, but I know that I could never. What should I do?"

She heard that little voice in her head answer her with a simple 'slap him and leave him.' Her ears picked up a particularly loud moan come from below. Her soul twisted into a knot that made pain surge through every centimeter of her hated, unneeded body. Tears doubled in intensity, and her body started to shake.

"Hiro…" She felt more pressure inside well up inside her body, particularly in her throat. "Hi… ro…" Her body jerked forward, and she fell into a fit of coughs. She stood up, running into the bathroom. She arrived in the room when her body could not handle the pressure anymore, and her body heaved blood from her mouth. She felt the blood hit the tiled floor.

She remained still for what felt like a few minutes, taking deep breaths while supporting herself with her hands and knees. "No… I can't let the bathroom stay dirty. Hiro will be displeased…" She heard her breaths escape from her mouth, and as she opened the nearby cabinet to grab a rag, she saw her hand shake violently.

"It hurts so much… It hurts so, so much, Hiro." She grabbed an older rag that she brought from her mother's house. "It's my fault. I won't dirty Hiro's washcloths." The rag touched the end of the puddle, and she pushed in. "It's so dirty… It hurts so, so much."

She repressed more regurgitation and put her hand lightly to her heart. The rag once again started to push the vomit towards the center. "Tomoko…" She felt more pulses rustling throughout her body. She felt her breathing get heavier. She saw her hands shake even more as her hands soaked up the blood.

"It… it hurts." The tears started to blend with the vomit. "It hurts!" Her rag was completely sopping. She felt light-headed, and her vision started to blur. "No… I've got to clean this up. Otherwise, the mistake might catch up with me."

Her breathing became all she could hear. There were no more moans from Hiro, no more scrapes when the rag wiped more vomit from the tiles floor. Her vision blurred some more, and she felt as if she was going to die. She felt more vomit on its way and let the blood colored mixture join the vomit already on the tiled floor.

She felt weak, and she did not believe that she could support herself much longer. She struggled back up to the sink and washed her mouth off, watching as the water washed away the vomit and blood. Her hand struggled to stop the rush of water.

Then, everything just went black. She felt her hand still hanging in the sink's bowl, and she knew that her body was still lying against the counter. Her breathing had lessened. She could not even hear that anymore.

_The pain's starting to leave me, but I don't understand. Why can't I move? Why can't I finish cleaning my mess? Tomoko… Help me through this Tomoko. Tomoko, why can't I see?_ Then, all of a sudden, she felt nothing at all.

_**Though I battle blind**_

_**Love is a fate resigned**_

_**Memories mar my mind**_

_**Love is a fate resigned**_

_**Over futile odds,**_

_**And laughed at by the gods**_

_**And now the final frame**_

_**Love is a losing game**_


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: Fruits Basket does not belong to me, nor will it ever.**

Note: Well, now that I feel bad about making you wait a half-year for a chapter, I'm now actually going to work to get this done in at least two weeks.

Update: Congratulations to me for actually getting this fic back up and running. It's a new school season, and I will try for the weekly update, but I promise NOTHING!

_**Sometimes I find myself sitting back and reminiscing**_

_**Especially when I to watch other people kissing**_

_**And I remember when you started calling me your missus**_

_**All the play fighting, all the flirtatious disses**_

_**I tell you sad stories about my childhood**_

_**I don't know why I trusted you, but I knew that I could**_

_**We'd spend our whole weekend lying in our own dirt**_

_**I was just so happy in your boxers and your t-shirt**_

_**Dreams, dreams**_

_**Of when we had just started things**_

_**Dreams of you and me**_

_**And it seems, it seems**_

_**That I can't shake those memories**_

_**I wonder if you have the same dreams too**_

_**The littlest things that take me there**_

_**I know it sounds lame, but it's so true**_

_**I know it's not right, but it seems unfair**_

_**The things are reminding me of you**_

_**Sometimes I wish we could just pretend**_

_**Even if only for one weekend**_

_**So come on**_

_**Tell me**_

_**Is this the end?**_

_Hiro held her in his arms. They had just separated from a passionate kiss that had left Kisa with little breath. Her arms felt weak, like how she had always felt since had her first kiss with Hiro. Life was good, and her romance was about to reach its highest stage yet. She was to be married in two weeks._

_Her arms wrapped around his neck lightly, and her smile was wide and genuine. How many other women were ever lucky enough to be able to feel what she has felt? How many people could have a life as perfect as hers?_

_Was it selfish to say that her life was perfect? Was she lying? Did it even matter? Her arms wrapped around loosely around his neck, and they kissed again. Nothing could ever take her happiness away. Why would anything even want to?_

_They let go of each other, and she watched as Hiro slowly unbuttoned his shirt. His smirk grew as she leaned forward, kissing his neck and nipping at his shoulders. "Hiro, I'll always love you, no matter what. Will you do the same for me?"_

_"Yes." Hiro's hand stroked her cheek, and his lips kissed her cheek. "I promise you." _Once again, Kisa's vision went black. She felt nothing. It was just like she was floating in space or not really existing. She wanted to return to her previous vision, back to when Hiro was in complete love with her.

That was when things were ideal, and she thought her life would never fall in standing. She remembered when Hiro loved her, when Hiro kept her safe and protected her. Why did that time have to leave? Why did her perfection decide to abandon her? Had she been lying to herself about happiness?

_She saw some blurs that soon was shown to be a little girl with her eyes playing in the field. She could be no older than three, and she recognized a particular look she was giving. It was Hiro's._

_"Tomoko, how was your day?" The little girl stopped and looked up at her mother. Her hair was starting to grow to a moderate length, and she had a startlingly bronze color to her hair. Her index finger was poking at her bottom lip, and it was removed to reveal the start of what became a huge childish smile._

_"It was okay, Mommy." Tomoko hugged Kisa's hand, letting go to just hold it. "Come on, Momma. I want to show you something."_

_Being dragged by her daughter, Kisa was led a clearing in the flower field where another little girl stood. She was a bit taller than Tomoko, and her hair was a beautiful silver. She looked up to reveal deep purple eyes, and instantly Kisa recognized the four-year-old. It was Kii, long dead from the accident that caused Kyo's disappearance long ago._

_"Lookee, it's my new friend." Tomoko grabbed at Kisa's dress. "She's been really, really nice to me." She looked up into her mother's wide, wondering eyes. Kisa wondered whether her daughter was thinking something bad, like 'Did I do something wrong?'_

_Kii stared back at Kisa. It was strange to see Sissy's daughter again, and now her own daughter had befriended the girl, like she really would have in a perfect world. Was she really alive… in this dream? Did she come back as a ghost? Was this just another perfect fantasy… what the world should be?_

_"Hello again, Auntie." _The vision blurred and darkened, and soon, she was floating in the nothingness again. That last fantasy… That was what she wanted for her child. That would have been the perfect life for her daughter, a life of happiness that was unsurpassed anywhere in the world. She would have the perfect family, a dad to love her. It was all thrown out the window now.

What type of life would Tomoko get if Hiro left? Would it be acceptable? How could they get by together, just the two of them and sometimes Sissy and Kyo? Is Tomoko doomed to be like Kii, losing all happiness in childhood?

Another vision started to appear, this one more chaotic than the other two. _Hiro stood in the kitchen, looking over a burnt meal Kisa had forgot about in the oven. A vein on the top of his head seemed about to burst. He was pacing around the dining table, and she was standing opposite from him._

_"Kisa! Do you understand what could have happened if I had not found this, this mistake, in the oven? The kitchen could have gone up in flames. What would we have done then, moved in with Kyo and Tohru… boarded in the main house? Kyo and Tohru don't have the room, and the main house doesn't want us. We don't have anywhere to go."_

_Hiro walked around to her, and his entire body gave off a vibe of disgust and anger. "Don't you understand…I've worked hard for everything in this house, and you are just going to let this place burn to the ground?" He raised his hand and slapped her across the face, following the action with a push that had her fall against the floor_

_"We've just got to get you to understand! Then, everything should start out being okay… Everything will be okay after that. Then, we can be an example of a perfect family."_

_Kisa looked up at Hiro. He also had a desire for a perfect family. He just was doing it the wrong way. He was alienating her… He was hurting her. What could she do about it though? She really did love him, but if he kept this up, would she be able to handle it, or would the story of Tohru repeat itself?_

Suddenly, she felt cloth surround her body, and she opened her eyes. It took a few moments to adjust, but she quickly saw that she was in hospital room, in the bed. Hiro sat on the opposite wall, and she saw doctors and nurses scampering around the room, getting work done.

Turning to the right, she saw two more people. "Sissy…"

_**Drinking tea in bed, watching dvds**_

_**When I discovered all your dirty, grotty magazines**_

_**You'd take me out shopping, and all we'd buy is trainers**_

_**As if we ever needed anything to entertain us**_

_**The first time that you introduced me to your friends**_

_**And you could tell that I was nervous, so you held my hands**_

_**When I was feeling down, you'd make that face you do**_

_**There's no one in the world who could replace you**_

_**Dreams, dreams**_

_**Of when we had just started things**_

_**Dreams of you and me**_

_**And it seems, it seems**_

_**That I can't shake those memories**_

_**I wonder if you have the same dreams too**_

_**The littlest things that take me there**_

_**I know it sounds lame, but it's so true**_

_**I know it's not right, but it seems unfair**_

_**The things are reminding me of you**_

_**Sometimes I wish we could just pretend**_

_**Even if only for one weekend**_

_**So come on**_

_**Tell me**_

_**Is this the end?**_

Note: Another chapter done, and I felt that I should explain my half-year hiatus. After taking a small break of two weeks from writing, I became engrossed in writing original horror stories. These stories, mixed in with sporadic periods of no writing, were the bulk of that half-year.


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: I still don't own it, but would I really tell strangers if I did?**

Note: Ugh… I got sick and it sent everything back. I'm sorry about that. I'm feeling better and writing now.

Note: Merry Christmas. Yep. This year was much better than last year.

Note: Semester testing over… now time to work on this again.

_**Don't know what to do anymore**_

_**I've lost the only love worth fighting for**_

_**I'll drown in my tear storming sea**_

_**That would show you**_

_**That would make you hurt like me**_

_**All the same**_

_**I don't want mud-slinging games**_

_**It's just a shame**_

_**To let you walk away**_

_**Is there a chance**_

_**A fragment of light**_

_**At the end of the tunnel**_

_**A reason to fight?**_

_**Is there a chance**_

_**You may change your mind**_

_**Or are we ashes and wine?**_

_**Ooh, Don't know if my fates already sealed**_

_**This day's a spinning circus on a wheel**_

_**And I'm ill with the thought of your kiss**_

_**Coffee-laced**_

_**Intoxicating on her lips**_

Tohru reached her arms around Kisa's head. "Kisa… You're awake. I was so worried." She felt a tear fall from Tohru's face and onto her cheek. "We got a phone call just minutes after seven, and I was so worried, so Kyo brought me over right away, and you've been asleep for hours. Thank goodness you're awake."

Tohru loosened her grip and slowly slid back to an upright position. Next to her sat Momiji. Momiji had grown so much since she last saw him. He was now taller than Tohru, but he still had his childlike face. "Kisa… Are you alright?" His voice had deepened, but she still felt that childlike attitude that made Momiji lovable.

Suddenly, she remembered that Momiji was supposed to be in Britain studying. "What are you doing here? When did you arrive?"

"I'm taking a week's vacation, and I arrived this morning to the news of you being in the hospital." He smiled. "I arrived as fast as I could, but Tohru still beat me here by at least and hour."

"Sissy…" Kisa sat up in her bed and cramped. "How long have you been here?"

"All day." The voice came from behind a door. "And damn it, I missed work today because of it." The door opened and Kyo walked in carrying sandwiches and canned drinks. Despite his 'damn it', he was smiling when he entered the room.

"Looks like Kyo's happy you're okay too!" Momiji jumped up and laughed. "He hasn't changed a bit."

"And you're still the same damn brat you've always been, even if you don't look it anymore." Kyo threw a sandwich at Momiji. "That one's yours."

"Silly Kyo, I'm not the same brat you once knew. I'm much worse than I was back then." Momiji opened the wrapping of his sandwich and bit in with childlike joy. "Kyo, give me my soda… I'm thirsty, and I paid for it."

Hearing a door slam, Kisa sat up and saw that Hiro had left. The sandwich that was meant for him still sat on a nearby table, with a mug of lukewarm coffee he had been drinking. Footsteps could be heard traveling down the hall. "Damn it!" Kyo ran after Hiro, slamming the door even harder.

She felt wetness form on her cheek. It felt cold, and she pushed her blankets tighter against her skin. Seconds passed, and she was warm again, but it was not because of the blankets. She felt pressure from the arms of Momiji plug her eyelids, and she felt Tohru's hand as it wiped away a tear.

For seconds they lay still, until Momiji finally released his embrace. The door opened again, and the doctor came within her sight. "The tests are in, and everything seems healthy. Perhaps it was an emotional problem. Has there been anything that could have caused this?"

Without moving her lips, Kisa nodded and wiped another tear from forming in her eye. "Can I leave?"

"Like I said, you seem perfectly fine, and the baby is also healthy. You can go home." He lowered his head and walked out of the door.

Two hours later, Kisa stood outside of her house. She saw a light in the master bedroom window. _Hiro…_ What was he doing that he would just leave her?

There was something malicious in the ebony eyes of Naomi, but she could not figure out what. All she knew is that was not the usually look of a lover. It was the look of hatred… hatred for everyone.

She silently opened the door and removed her long green coat. Her body stilled as she grabbed for a shoe, and she fell to the ground, letting out one tear from each eye. "What's going on? Why is this happening to my baby? I'm sorry Tomoko." Seconds passed in silence, until she heard a slight squeak from the bedroom.

Her shoes made light bangs against the wall as they hit, and she stood up, quietly walking to a doorway at the end of the hall. She grabbed the handle and pushed it open, revealing a room painted a pastel pink. The largest object was a recently bought crib. It was circular and had three pillows with the embroidery Tomoko S. Above the bed was a small mobile. It lay perfectly still. Lace curtains draped down around the crib, a little image of perfection.

Kisa felt another tear fall down her cheek, and she took a few small steps towards the crib. She could already hear the small whimpers coming from the sleeping Tomoko, and she walked over. "It's okay, Tomoko… Don't cry. Everything will be okay." She leaned down to kiss where Tomoko's head would be, and her hand turned the mobile, starting a familiar tune.

_Twinkle, twinkle little star_

_How I wonder what you are?_

_Up above the world so high_

_Like a diamond in the sky._

_Twinkle, twinkle little star_

_How I wonder what you are?_

Kisa hummed along with the tune, starting it again. "Tomoko, you're the one little star in my sky. Yes you are." Wrapping her arms around herself, Kisa stood alone… in the center of the room, letting a few more precious tears fall.

"I'll be back to check on you later, Tomoko. Don't cry now…" She turned slowly and walked out of the only room that still gave her happiness. "Bye…" With that word, she took the last step out of the room, shutting the door behind her. "Sweet dreams, Tomoko."

She let her body slide down the door, and her cheeks felt the wet tears fall in a river. Her head sank down, falling to her knees. "Why?" Her mouth let out a wail, and her entire body trembled in despair. "Why is it like this?"

"Because I'm here." Kisa heard that voice, that same seductive voice as the night before. Looking up, she saw deep ebony eyes of Naomi. She saw that same hatred… that hatred of her. "Hiro loves me now."

"No he doesn't… He can't." Kisa's body felt as frail as a feather. "He still loves me. I know he does." _I'm so tired._ She felt her arms slip, and she felt her body hit that horrible woman.

_**Cut it out**_

_**I've got no claim on you now**_

_**Not allowed**_

_**To weigh your freedom down**_

_**Is there a chance**_

_**A fragment of light**_

_**At the end of the tunnel**_

_**A reason to fight?**_

_**Is there a chance**_

_**You may change your mind**_

_**Or are we ashes and wine?**_

_**And I'll tell myself**_

_**If that is what you need there is no**_

_**Regret**_

_**It's just the same**_

_**But is there a chance**_

_**A fragment of light**_

_**At the end of the tunnel**_

_**A reason to fight?**_

_**Is there a chance**_

_**You may change your mind**_

_**Or are we ashes and wine?**_

_**Are we just ashes and wine?**_

_**Are we ashes?**_


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: If I owned Fruits Basket, I would be extremely happy, and I would update quicker.**

Note: I've officially decided that teacher's in the school system should have access to tazers.

_**Without you**_

_**The ground thaws**_

_**The rain falls**_

_**The grass grows**_

_**Without you**_

_**The seeds root**_

_**The flowers bloom**_

_**The children play**_

_**The stars gleam**_

_**The poets dream**_

_**The eagles fly**_

_**Without you**_

_**The Earth turns**_

_**The sun burns **_

_**But I die without you**_

_**Without you**_

_**The breeze warms**_

_**The girl smiles**_

_**The cloud moves**_

_**Without you**_

_**The tides change**_

_**The boys run**_

_**The oceans crash**_

_**The crowds roar**_

_**The days soar**_

_**The babies cry**_

"Get off me!" Naomi pushed Kisa's head off her leg and let it fall to the carpeted hallway with a thud. Instantly, Kisa felt the tears push themselves out of her eyes, and she began to bawl on the floor.

"He loves me… He… has to love me." Kisa put her hands around Naomi's leg like a manacle. "We're… about to have… a baby." She felt her hands kicked off the evil woman's leg.

"I'm telling you one last time that he does not love you anymore, and it would be better if you just left him alone." Naomi smirked and lightly brushed Kisa's head with the heel of her shoe, leaving a small scratch. "If I were you, I'd pack my things and leave…" She smirked.

"He loves me! HE HAS TO LOVE ME!" Kisa's body jerked up from the wooden floor, and she screamed on her hands and knees. "I know that he loves me! I know it!" She raised one hand to her mouth and let out a cracking howl. "He has to love me… Get out. Get out of… my house."

By now, Naomi was chuckling lightly. "This isn't your house. This is Hiro-kun's house, and he doesn't want you here anymore. He wants _me_ here. Baby, I'm not going anywhere." She kneeled down and stared into the perturbed eyes of the pregnant woman. "You get out."

Kisa shut her eyes before letting out a small giggle. "Fine… I'll go, but I'll just let you know that every evil thing you have ever done to me will be done to you. It's called karma, and I know that it's just waiting for you to give it a chance." Tears were streaking her cheeks, and her limbs were shaking. "I'll just be upstairs, packing… Oh, and tell Hiro that I will always love him."

Slowly and unsteadily, she stood up and stepped down the hallways. She felt her feet almost give way as she turned and tried to get up the first step. She felt the pressure return into her body. "Not again…" She looked up and saw that Naomi was already gone. "Hiro…" She felt as if she was being crushed, but she had to get upstairs.

She had to get everything that she needed, and perhaps one day she would be back one day. Struggling up a few more steps, Kisa stopped and rested. Why was it that everything that Hiro did seemed to affect her health so badly? "Tomoko, give me some strength… for you. I'm doing all this for you."

Kisa's feet finally reached the second floor and started to long trudge to her bedroom. She suddenly heard a high-pitched scream from Hiro's room, and she recognized Naomi's voice. "Hiro!" More screams came from below, steadily growing louder.

She slammed the door behind her as she entered the bedroom she had recently been inhabiting, at least ever since he had first hit her. "Tomoko, what should I take with me?" She had held them back since Naomi disappeared, but now, the tears had started to fall down her face, two little waterfalls running down from her eyes. 

Opening her drawer, Kisa grabbed all of her maternity outfits, and she felt around for her favorite photograph. Eventually, her hand brushed against it and pulled the photo out for her blurred eyes to see. There stood Hiro and Kisa, standing in an older Catholic church, in their wedding garbs. Kisa sniffed and tried to remember why she had chosen to have her wedding in that church.

A few seconds passed before her mind decided to cooperate, and she remembered what the church looked like. It was a large church that had been built before Japan had become isolated and was converted to a monastery after the disappearance of Western influence on the country. Later, it was changed back to a Catholic church, but what made it her wedding choice were the beautiful windows.

There were twelve windows, six on each side of the building, and each window showed one animal of the Zodiac mixed in with religious scenes. The ram stood on the right side of his window, looking to the window next to it, and in that window, the tiger was pawing at the ram's window. "I thought it was a sign that we were meant to be, but… I guess that I was living a dream."

Pulling out a suitcase, she carefully packed her maternity outfit and some more essential items. She took most of the wedding pictures, but she left him with one where she was kissing his cheek. Her hand grabbed at her jewelry and the marriage certificate. After she put those items in the suitcase, she closed the suitcase and started to the front door.

She almost tripped on the way down the stairs, and she dropped the suitcase halfway down the flight. Thankfully, she was not injured. Her breath was still heavy, and she just thanked that nothing in her case was breakable. The tears had stopped again. Her eyes saw clearly, but she knew that something as simple as a feather touching her skin could probably make her tears flow again.

Dragging the suitcase out of the house and into the street, she started on her way to sanctuary. Her eyes had yet to adjust to the blackness that was her surroundings, and her body required frequent stops on benches that she passed. An hour passed, and she stopped again.

_I love you so much, Tomoko. I really do. You may not feel it now, but I promise you that I will always love you. _She closed her eyes and visualized that little girl from her dream. The girl was smiling, and Kisa smiled back. "I love you too, Mommy."

Suddenly, she felt a small raindrop hit her face. _I've got to go, Tomoko, but I hope to see you again soon._ Her eyes opened, and her feet resumed the slow pace she had been walking earlier. She felt another raindrop and another.

Soon, the sprinkling of water turned to a drizzle and, eventually, a downpour. Her clothes were soaked through, and she started to cry again. "Hiro… I guess this really is goodbye."

A few minutes of walking in the rain later, she saw her sanctuary. There was still a light in the living area's window. That meant that somebody was still awake… Her feet rushed forward, down the walkway to the front door. She felt her legs slipping on the wet cement, but she had to reach sanctuary. Her eyes saw the front door, and her arm rose to touch the doorbell.

Her leg lurched, and she started to fall forward. No, she had to hit the doorbell. It was the only way to make into the sanctuary of Tohru's home. Her arm reached out and lightly pushed the button down before slipping from the wall.

She felt the step hit her leg and cement scrape her bare arm. She felt pain all over. Her head laid itself down on the cement, and through blurred eyes, she saw the door crack open. She heard a gasp and saw a foot walk onto the wet cement.

Then, all was black.

_**Without you**_

_**The moon glows**_

_**The river flows**_

_**But I die without you**_

_**The world revives**_

_**Colors renew**_

_**But I know blue**_

_**Only blue**_

_**Lonely blue**_

_**Within me, blue**_

**_Without you _**

**_Without you_**

_**The hand gropes**_

_**The ear hears**_

_**The pulse beats**_

_**Without you**_

_**The eyes gaze**_

_**The legs walk**_

_**The lungs breathe**_

_**The mind churns**_

_**The heart yearns**_

_**The tears dry**_

_**Without you**_

_**Life goes on**_

_**But I'm gone**_

'_**Cause I die without you**_

_**Without you**_

_**Without you**_

_**Without you**_


	7. Chapter 7

Title: Without You

By: Author 888

**Disclaimer: Author 888 in no way is affiliated with the author, artist, or any company related to the anime or manga Fruits Basket**

Note: Has anybody ever met somebody so idiotic that even when he or she realizes that he or she are in the wrong, they still argue their case and repeat already disproven ideas? I AM SO DAMN TIRED OF THOSE PEOPLE!

Update: Sorry about the wait… Two things have stopped me from updating. First: My computer kinda blew-up. Second: The Democratic presidential primary, but now that those are over (I miss you Hillary…), I can get on with this fic.

**_Something always brings me back to you_**

_**It never takes too long**_

_**No matter what I say or do**_

_**I'll still feel you here**_

'_**Til the moment I'm gone**_

_**You hold me without touch.**_

_**You keep me without chains**_

_**I never wanted anything so much**_

_**Than to drown in your love**_

_**And not feel your pain**_

_**Set me free, leave me be**_

_**I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity**_

_**Here I am and I stand so tall**_

_**Just the way I'm supposed to be**_

_**But you're on to me and all over me**_

_**You love me 'cause I was fragile**_

_**When I thought that I was strong**_

_**But you touch me for a little while**_

_**And all my fragile strength is gone**_

"Kisa, are you okay?" Kisa heard the kind voice that she had heard recently. She felt the voice embrace her body, wrapping itself around her in comfort. Her eyes opened to see the blonde rabbit standing over her. "Kisa, what were you doing on the porch step?"

Her head felt as if it was boiling, and she gasped as a splitting headache appeared out of nowhere. "Momiji? Were you the one who…?" She stopped as the headache crushed her forehead. The pain was so strong. She could not stand it. Her eyes slammed shut, and she almost screamed in pain.

"Kisa! Hold on… I'll be right back with some medicine." Kisa's eyes opened to see Momiji's back run out the door. "Tohru! Tohru! Kisa's in pain!" She heard him shout as he ran down the hallway and around a corner.

She heard a banging as somebody, probably Tohru, shut a cabinet. Footsteps soon were rushing across the wooden floors of the home, and she heard water flowing from the kitchen faucet. She shut her eyes again, and she lowered her head down the pillow, providing a more even surface to lie on. Why was it that closing her eyes made the intensity of the pain lessen?

The footsteps got louder again, and she soon heard a knock on the wall. "I'm back, Kisa. Open your eyes and take these pills." Opening her eyes again, she pushed her body up so she could take the medication. Grabbing the seltzer water and two capsules, she placed them on the nearby bed table.

"Thank you very much, Momiji." Kisa put her right hand slightly below her neck and drew a deep breath. "I've just been such a burden on everybody, first the disease the incident yesterday and now this…" Her fingertips touched the glass of seltzer water, wrapping around the smooth glass. She lifted it, feeling her arm shaking, and saw some of the liquid drop onto the bedspread.

Instantaneously, she set the glass down. "Oh no! What will I tell Tohru?" Suddenly, she felt the pain in her cheek, the same soreness that she got after a slap from Hiro. "I… I've got to clean it, before it sets in." She started to shift towards the end of the bed before getting stopped by Momiji.

"Stop it, Kisa! You aren't in any condition to leave this bed. Please… I'll get Tohru." He gently returned her to the center of the bed before running back out of the room. "Tohru! Come here! Kisa needs you!"

She heard more cabinets open, and before she could sit back up and leave the bed, Tohru and Momiji both entered with cleaning supplies. "Sissy… I'm sorry about the mess."

"Nonsense… It's just carbonated water, nothing dangerous. I'll have it out in a jiffy." She kneeled down next to the bed and looked at the small wet spot. "This'll be easy enough. Momiji, give me a towel." Tohru grabbed the towel from him, applying pressure to the spot. "See, all done."

Kisa had always loved the radiant smile that flowed off of Tohru's face. It calmed her, even that day she had first met Tohru as a tiger. Tohru was giving off that same smile at the moment, standing up from the mess. "Can you help me, Sissy?"

Tohru nodded before turning to Momiji. "Will you take this to the kitchen? Place it on the same rack we got it off of." With that, Momiji left.

Tohru twisted back to face the bedridden woman, and she made her way to the bedside table. Carefully, she wiped the edges of the glass with her shirt and picked the glass up. With her other hand, she lifted the two pills and set them in the seltzer water. "Okay, now let's get this over with."

Kisa took her first drink and was instantaneously overcome with the uncomfortable taste of carbonation and pills. She felt her face pucker and her eyes cringe, but she swallowed. Quickly, her mouth was full of another mouthful of the liquid, coughing as she swallowed the second mouthful.

There was just one more gulp left, and it was time to take it. She had to finish this, if not for her for her baby. She once again took the distasteful liquid in her mouth, swallowing the last bit. Taking a deep breath, Kisa laid back onto the soft pillow below her. "Thank you."

"It's no problem, Kisa. You know that I would do anything for you." Tohru set the empty glass back down and walked around the bed to open some curtains. "Some light will do you good." After the curtains were securely away from the window, Tohru sat down on the bed and put her hand on Kisa's. "Is Tomoko okay?"

"Yeah, I think she is." Kisa's head nodded downward. She had endangered her poor baby so many times these past few days. She was just a burden on everybody. Her mind traveled back to the previous night, and she felt tears about to fall from her eyes.

Tohru bent over her patient and hugged the tiger. "I'm glad that Tomoko is safe." When Tohru returned upright, she gave off the radiant smile that always managed to calm Kisa, that same smile that made her open up to Sissy all those years ago.

"Thank you, Sissy." She was about to close her eyes and try to rest when her mind once again went to the previous night. "By the way, who was it that ran out of the house last night? Was it-"

"Momiji. He saw you running up the road and ran to get you." Tohru stood up. "Well, I had better be going. If you need anything, just call."

"Thank you… and I'm sorry. It's all my fault that this happened." Kisa let out a sniffle as Tohru passed the doorway.

"Nonsense. Not only is this no problem, but also it's not your fault. Things like this just happen." She turned again, giving off another calming smile, and laughed. "Now you don't worry. Would you like to the door shut or open?"

How was it that Tohru always managed to make so much sense on large issues such as this? She was so oblivious to the smaller problems, such as when she overworked herself. "Would you please leave it open?" Kisa felt herself being taken back to the days when she was still in middle school. She remembered all the times she had followed her around in silence, pointing to things and rarely speaking. When did those times slip away?

Her mind went to her second year of high school, back when Hiro was a first year. She thought about how quiet she was in classes and how the teasing by the other students had started to lighten. Maybe that was what caused her to become a little more social, or maybe Hiro had something to do with it. Back then he was still cruel to everybody, especially poor Tohru, but he could also be so kind and supportive.

Then her mind wandered to when Akito had died, and Yuki had announced his plans to the Sohmas. That was when it truly had felt okay to be open… There was no more persecution for love or hatred for going out and having fun. That was when she had stopped being silent. She was still quiet, but she no longer had any reason to be silent. Was that when she had changed so much?

It still seemed that she could nothing right. She had ruined her marriage, and her baby was constantly in danger. She was a burden on Tohru, Kyo, and Momiji. Yet, thinking about it, she realized how far she had come and that perhaps some good would come once Tomoko was born.

Closing her eyes, Kisa thought about Hiro once more. She thought about her first night of passion with him and blushed. Could she still really love him, and what about Naomi? She remembered the hate she had seen in Hiro's lover's eyes, and she felt that there was no love for him in her. Why was she doing this? What was she trying to accomplish?

What did it matter? Hiro had obviously moved on… "Hiro, I still love you." With those words ringing in her ears, she fell asleep.

The next three months passed with relative ease, with the exception of Momiji's departure after a week. He had become almost as loved as Sissy in his care taking, never forgetting her and giving hourly check-ups. Some sort of emptiness appeared after he left, but it was soon filled with work. A few days after leaving, Kisa gained enough strength to start doing some household tasks, and many times she would baby-sit while Tohru would do some shopping.

Sadly, that all came to an end a week after Tiburo's fourth birthday. Kisa had finally adjusted to life without Hiro and life with Tohru and Kyo. She knew when to anticipate outbursts of anger or pain from Kyo's lips, and it was her job to cover Tiburo's ears when he would. None of the outbursts were ever at Tohru but were instead caused by injuries caused from him not paying attention or doing something wrong.

She had finally accepted this new lifestyle, and it was pleasing her. It was now her final month of pregnancy, and Tomoko had become restless. She was reminded of the complaints she once heard on a television program when the soon-to-be mother started screaming about the evil parasite that had invaded her body. She thought it was an exaggeration, but now she understood the pain that lady had felt.

A loud knock started to echo through the house, and she told Tiburo to sit and wait for her to return to him in the living area. Going to the door, she opened it and gave a standard greeting before realizing who was in front of her. Hiro bowed and entered, followed by a scowling Naomi.

Kisa could not decide what to do, all she knew was that whatever was happening was not good. She felt her face clench as she shut the door behind them, and no words dared exit her mouth.

"Well, aren't you going to say anything?" Kisa was too flustered to pay attention to who had spoken, but she managed to stutter another simplistic greeting before Kyo walked into the room.

"Welcome Hiro and…" Suddenly, Kyo's voice trailed off. "Damn it! How the hell did you find me, Carmelita?"

_**Set me free, leave me be**_

_**I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity**_

_**Here I am and I stand so tall**_

_**Just the way I'm supposed to be**_

_**But you're on to me and all over me**_

_**I live here on my knees as I **_

_**Try to make you see that**_

_**You're everything I think I need here on the ground**_

_**But you're neither friend nor foe**_

_**Though I can't seem to let you go**_

_**That one thing that I still know**_

_**Is that you're keeping me down**_

_**Keeping me down**_

_**You're on to me**_

_**You're on to me and all over…**_

_**Something always brings to you**_

_**It never takes too long.**_


End file.
